If you’re in a relationship and going through the menopause, there can be a lot of disruption.
Loss of libido and vaginal dryness can take away the intimacy of a relationship. Mood swings and anxiety can create a separation, misunderstandings and trouble sleeping. The stress can cause resentment.
It’s cliché, but we all know that relationships are hard work. They’re effort. You might not be able to control your body and mind every second of the day, but you can put in effort to add in a bit of time for the relationship. What better way to make time than on holiday? But planning a romantic getaway isn’t always that easy…
Firstly, you’ve got to be real with yourself. A hot and sunny beach trip might sound like the perfect romantic trip but if you’re just going to be suffering through hot sweats and be self-conscious in your swimsuit the whole time you’re there. You’re going to be thinking a lot less about the romance and a lot more about yourself. Travelling with the menopause adds a few hurdles and challenges which can completely be overcome, but need to be factored in. Basically, be prepared. Bring your cooling spray, your CBD (if you can), your HRT, your breathable clothing, your moisturizers (for outside and in), and really any and everything you’ll need to feel normal.
Just because you’re on holiday, doesn’t mean your symptoms are.
That said, you can also get prepared for a bit more fun too. Indulge in a bit of shopping for new dresses and lingerie. Get yourself a mani-pedi, do your hair real nice…you get it. Strangely enough, often times the trick to romance is feeling good about yourself. The more confident you feel, the more you’re going to radiate a positive energy. Instead of thinking about your pains, your anxieties, or your looks, you’ll be thinking about the moment. It’s hard to feel romantic and sweet when you’re feeling awful inside. Getting yourself in the mindset of going on holiday and feeling confident will help spark up the romance. Of course, that’s not to say that you need sexy lingerie and a new haircut to build up confidence, but if it’s a short-notice trip, these things can certainly help speed up the process. Regardless, the point is to do what you’ve got to do to try and ensure you’ll be confident about yourself while away. You don’t want your getaway to be filled with self-conscious doubt!
Next, let’s be honest. Your partner might not be too keen on going or at least, on going where you want to go. But you don’t need to go on this big, magic, adventurous trip for it to be romantic. Even a one-night hotel stay at a hotel 30 minutes away from where you live can be just enough. Ultimately, a romantic getaway is just about cutting through the mundane routine and restarting the spark. Anything that’s a little bit different can do that.
You don’t have to go to Paris or the Maldives to have a romantic time.
Even a day trip and a picnic can do a lot. Talk to your partner about a few different options and pick the one that makes most sense, bearing in mind cost, time off work needed, and what you actually want to do.
Finally, make you sure you’ve got a plan for everything else in your life. If you have young kids, try and see if someone can look after them the weekend. If you need to bring them along, try and see if you can keep them in a daycare programme during the day, or get a bigger room allowing them to have their (and your) own space. If you have pets, make sure you pick a weekend where someone can feed them. If you’ve got a job, think about when the right time would be to maybe take a day or a half-day off. Travelling can be a bit stressful considering there are so many factors to take care of, but as long as you consider them all while booking your trip, all should be fine.
Again, you really don’t need to go across the world to have an amazing time with your partner. You can do a quick and short trip somewhere easy and nearby and still bring the magic.
Romance is about a lot more than a pretty backdrop and a lot of chocolates. It’s about that intimacy and bond that connects you and your partner.
You don’t need to go cliché if that’s not you. There’s something special that connects you with your partner, whether that’s having the same drive, the same hobbies, the same humour, the same tastes, or whatever else. That’s where you can find the romance. Whether that means ordering room service from a hotel down the road while watching reruns of your favourite show in bed, or going to a big city in a different country and booking a table at every fine dining restaurant. There’s the perfect trip out there that can remind you and your partner why you two work well together (even if it doesn’t always feel like it). Whatever that connecting factor is, build your romance around that. Romance doesn’t need to be forced, but it’s always important to make a bit of an effort to allow for it to spark up. At the end of the day, you deserve a bit of break and a bit of a romantic night – just do it the way that works for you!
Author: Eliza Cottarelli